What's Eating Chara?
by TurkeyJerky
Summary: Your attempt at making one of Chara's kinkier fantasies a reality, leads her to a revelation about your relationship and she suffers an existential crisis. (Takes place during the events of Chara is a Kinky [REDACTED].) (Part 2 of the Chara is a Kinky [REDACTED] series.)


The light from the midday sun drew a golden outline around the drawn curtains. You always felt a little self-conscious having the curtains closed in the middle of the day. It was like advertising to your neighbors that you were doing something shady. Which you were. Well, which you were about to be.

You were in your bedroom. This is where you kept your bed. And slept. That's really all you could say about this room... up until a few months ago.

There was a full size bed, a desk, a closet, a window... A visitor might think that this was just a normal bedroom. Certainly nothing weird went on in here! Then they would inhale...

The combination of odors throughout would reveal the true nature of this room. Firstly, there was sweat, for obvious reasons, then MTT brand personal lubricant, from that time you spilled a jumbo size bottle on the carpet, then baby powder, from the few times you experimented with latex clothing, burnt hair, from the wax play incident, which you will not be elaborating on, because you promised to never mention it again, under the threat of stabbing...

If these walls could talk... well, they'd probably need some therapy by now. They had seen some shit... uh, metaphorically, of course!

So far...

* * *

"Are you ready?", you asked her.

"Yes." She nodded once.

"You're sure you want to do this?", you asked her.

"Yes.", she said without hesitation.

"This really does something for you?", you asked, with an eyebrow raised.

"Oh yes.", she answered. "I've had this fantasy for as long as I can remember."

You tilted your head. "Really?", you asked, the pitch of your voice slightly higher than before. Your eyebrow was raised so high, it was in danger of floating off your face, like a Temmie's might.

"Yes, really.", she answered.

It was her, Chara, the girl who had spent most of both your lives living inside your head as a malevolent spirit, whispering to you, telling you to do evil things and eat chocolate. Just a few months ago, she escaped the prison you called a head by conjuring up a new body for herself using nothing but a generous helping of pure determination. She sat on the bed before you, waiting to see what you had in store for her.

Looking at her now, reminded you of the first time you saw her in her new body. You were a little ashamed about this, but you couldn't help but think about how attractive she was, even as she was detailing her plan to murder all your friends. With her large expressive red eyes, rosy red cheeks, unkempt shortish red hair, determined red soul... How could you not be? She really was beautiful. You could admit that now.

Things didn't start off great for you and corporeal Chara the first time you met. First, she threatened to hurt your friends. This hurt your feelings, so you hurt her. She liked you hurting her so she asked you to hurt her more. You couldn't hurt her like she wanted, so she threatened to hurt you if you didn't hurt her again... It was silly and poorly written.

All that led to you forming an odd relationship where you satisfied her sexually as best as you could and she didn't kill anyone. At least it started off that way...

When she was just a voice in the back of your mind, the two of you learned to get along ok, despite your, uh, ideological differences. You didn't have a choice, really. You were kind of stuck with each other.

But things changed when she got a body of her own and the two of you started fooling around. You started to... actually like each other. You got along better than you ever did, you enjoyed each other's company, you had fun with each other... You became... friends. Benefits with friends. And as of late, you were growing beyond that as well.

She was beautiful, intelligent, fun, kinky... She was just about the perfect girl for you. It was a shame about the whole wanting to kill everyone and everything thing. It was like one of those monkey paw like deals where you wish for a million dollars and the next day you get AIDS or something stupid like that.

But, you weren't sure where she stood on the killing situation now. She hadn't said a word about it since day one. Maybe she forgot about it? Or maybe she decided that doing kinky stuff with you was more fun that killing people? You were afraid to ask, lest the answer was the former and bringing it up would remind her.

There was a third possibility, too. What if she was just using you? What if it was only a matter of time before she got bored of you, stabbed you in the neck, and left to do the same to everyone else? You didn't like to think about it, but that meant nothing to your brain which would bring it up whenever it felt like it.

But despite the fact that she may still want to kill you, despite the megalomania, the random knives everywhere, the chocolate crumbs on the bed sheets... You were falling for her. And she was for you.

You wondered, though, did she understand what was happening here? Did she even know what romantic love felt like? She had died a child, then spent over a decade without a body. Love was a very physical emotion, involving pheromones and stuff... It would be hard to feel love if you didn't have a body...

Assuming she did know what love felt like, what would happen if she fell in love with you? Would she still want to go through with her quest for power? Could you convince her not to do it, like she did with you and your drinking milk straight out of the carton? Or would she just ignore her feelings and kill until they no longer existed?

Could love beat LOVE?

* * *

"Ok.", you said. "Well, hopefully my, uh, simulation meets all your expectations. Do you remember the safeword?"

"Yes.", she said.

"Well?" You placed your hands on your hips.

"Ugh." She rolled her eyes. "Do I have to?"

"Yes." You nodded.

"Legendary Fartmaster.", she replied. "Have I told you how much I hate our safeword before?"

"Yes." you said. "Just about every time. I know it's stupid, but that's what makes it a good safeword. It has to be something that won't be said accidentally during the act."

"How about 'oh God yes!'?", she asked. "I don't think I've ever said that!"

"Ha!", you said. "Actually, that might be better than what we have now. I can think of a couple times when 'Legendary Fartmaster' was relevant..."

"That only happened once!", she said. "And it was your fault. You were the one putting pressure on my abdomen. How about we use something completely random?" She thought for a second. "Turkey... Turkey... quirky? Turkey... murky? Turkey... jerky! Turkey jerky! How about 'turkey jerky'?"

"I prefer beef.", you said. "Seriously though, you said that yesterday."

"I did?", she said. "Not mid-coitus, though?"

"Yes, you did.", you said. "You said it during and right after."

"Oh, right..." She scratched her head. "I guess I did say it right as I, uh..."

"You didn't just say it, you shouted it.", you said.

"Yeah..." Her rosy red cheeks got a little bit rosier. "But I don't remember saying it afterwards..."

"I believe your exact words were 'Why did I shout 'turkey jerky' as I climaxed?'.", you said.

"Oh yeah, now I remember...", she said.

"And you said it twice last week..." You held up two fingers.

"Ok, fine.", she said. "'Legendary Fartmaster' is fine for now. Can we please have sex now?"

"You mean coitus?", you asked.

"Whatever!", she said. "Let's just do it!"

"Ok!" You clapped your hands together. "I'll be back in a couple minutes. Don't forget the safeword!" You left the bedroom to prepare.

* * *

She laid down on the bed and got comfortable. She smiled to herself. She had been waiting for this. You had been hyping it up ever since she requested it, teasing her with things like "I'm expecting a package today! It's for 'you know what'! No peeking!" or "I'm going out for 'supplies' for our little 'appointment' later this week! I'll be back in a bit!".

It was like Christmas morning for her and she was about to unwrap a present, only it wasn't a present, it was you! Then you would unwrap her and... uh... you know. Stuff.

The transformation was complete. There was nothing left of you. You had erased what you were and replaced it with something else. Something more terrible... Something more horrifying! You had become the thing that humans truly feared. The villain of their fairy tales. You were that which lived in the dark places, where even the light wasn't brave enough to venture, under the beds and in the closets of human children everywhere, waiting, for the opportune moment... to feed...

You burst through the bedroom door wearing some baggy old monster clothes and a monster Halloween mask. "Rawr! I am a hungry monster!" You had been practicing your monster voice. Unfortunately, on the menacing monster voice spectrum, it measured somewhere between Monster Kid and Cookie Monster. "I desire a human female to consume!"

"O-oh, n-no..." A smile crept up on her face. She was fighting the urge to laugh, but held it back like a pro. The two of you had spent so much time roleplaying at this point that you were both legitimately good at acting now. She collected herself and got into character. "*Ahem!* Oh, no! I hope you don't mean me!"

You pointed at her. "That is exactly who I mean!" Your pointing brought her attention to the blanket draped over your arm. She hadn't noticed it at first, probably too busy taking in your ridiculous getup.

"I love eating pretty girls!" You unfurled the blanket. "They taste so sweet!"

"Awww..." She smiled at you. You think she's pretty! "Thank y-"

You tossed the blanket on top of her and made a chomping sound. "Hhhhooowwwwpppp!"

"Huh?", she said. "What are you..." You hadn't told her exactly how you were going to make her fantasy a reality.

"You are now in my mouth!", you said.

"Oh, ok..." It was dark, she was warm... It was sort of like being in a monster's mouth... Some sort of blanket monster's mouth? Were they a thing? Probably. Buncha' freaks...

You grabbed the edge of the blanket with both hands and started flapping it up and down rapidly. Papers stacked on your desk and tacked to the walls fluttered about wildly.

"What the..." She ducked down and covered her head with her hands.

"Now I'm chewing you up!" You had to speak up so she could hear you over the wind storm you were creating. "Oh so tasty! Om nom nom! Time to swallow!"

You rolled her up in the blanket, like a burrito. A Charrito.

"Hey, what are you doing now?!" Her voice was muffled by the blanket.

"You are now in my esophagus!" You rolled her back and forth. "You are being pushed down into my stomach!"

You unrolled the blanket and released her. Before her inner ear could catch up, you threw the blanket back on top of her and balled it up around her like a bag.

"Agh!", was all she could say.

"Now you are in my stomach!" You massaged her through the blanket. "Can you feel my stomach acids working?"

The amount of nonsense occurring now had exceeded her threshold. "Ok, that's enough!", she said through laughter. "Legendary Fartmaster!"

"I'm sorry!" You pulled the blanket off her and removed your mask. "I saw this working a lot better in my head..."

"No, no, it's fine! You did great, it's just..." She waited for the giggles to pass. "I gotta be honest with you, I'm not really into this sort of thing. I brought it up as a joke."

"Oh..." A bead of sweat rolled down your forehead.

"I just wanted to see how you'd react.", she said. "I thought you'd refuse in some dramatic way like you usually do when I ask about something weird like this, but no, you said you thought you could actually do it! And this is what you came up with?"

"Yeah..." You wiped the sweat off your forehead and sat down on the bed next to her. "I... thought it would be better..."

"Are you kidding?", she said. "It was great! I haven't laughed this hard in ages! You're really creative, you know that?"

"Thanks." You were looking at the floor.

"Oh come on!", she said. "What's wrong? You're not mad that I lied to you are you?"

"No, it's not that...", you said. "Well, I guess it sorta is..."

"What is it?", she asked.

"It's just..." You raised your hands into the air and looked upwards as you searched for the right words. "I kinda put a lot of work into this one... I borrowed these authentic monster clothes, I special ordered this mask with real monster fur off the Internet, I practiced my monster voice every time I was alone..."

You frowned. "And that one time I thought I was alone..." It was a good thing the group of monsters that caught you were so cool about the whole thing. Imagine if that had turned into a scandal... "Monster Ambassador Caught Performing Racist Monster Imitation! 'I have no child.', says former monster queen. 'Well, I do say that.', says former king."

She didn't understand. "Why did you put so much effort into this one, of all things?"

"Well, the way you talked about it, made it seem like it was one of your ultimate fantasies.", you said. "Something you had always dreamed about... And because I thought it was so important to you, I took it really seriously. I wanted to make it as real as possible for you. I wanted it to be special..."

"Oh...", she said.

"I guess... I guess I just wanted to make you happy, you know?" You sighed. "But, it was all just a joke..."

* * *

Wow. She couldn't believe it. She couldn't believe that you would go to all this trouble for her. That you would work so hard on making some stupid fetish that she didn't even have real for her. And why? Just because you thought she really liked it? You just wanted to make her happy? That's all it took? That's all it took... Wow. You... you were so sweet to her... You had done this and... You had done so much for her...

You actually cared for her, didn't you? She supposed that she knew this already, subconsciously. It was obvious now that she thought about it. But your stupid little grand gesture made it apparent to her.

Wow. She felt bad about deceiving and disappointing you, but those feelings were overridden by a larger positive one. For the first time in a long time, somebody cared about her. Truly. It felt nice... It was nice being... wanted, valued... She missed this feeling... She hadn't felt this way since...

She remembered what happened, no, what she had done, to the last person that cared for her. The memories flooded into her head and washed away the nice feelings inside. Then she remembered what she was doing to the current person that she thought cared for her. Her head was now overflowing with bad memories to the point that they started leaking out of the corners of her eyes.

Reality returned to her. She remembered the context of your so-called relationship. You didn't care. Not really. How could you? She was holding you, your friends, and everyone else's lives hostage. All the nice and sweet things you had done had been for them, not her. You were pacifying her. Giving her what she wanted so she wouldn't hurt anyone. Make Chara happy or everybody dies.

Somehow she had gotten caught up in the moment and forgot all this. In that moment she had forgotten who and what she was. She believed for just a second that your kindness was genuine and that she meant something to you. But it wasn't real, was it? It was just another "simulation".

She was so stupid. Stupid to think that anyone could possibly care about her. Not without the threat of death for you and everyone you loved looming over your head. She should have known better. It was impossible to care about someone like her. She was a bad person. She wanted to hurt people. She...

She wanted to kill you. Right now. She slowly turned her gaze towards you, like a battleship aiming its guns. Invisible rays of pure hatred shot out of her eyes. If looks could kill... Actually, this look probably could kill you if you were a monster. Since you weren't, the carcinogenic hatred rays were just slowly giving you cancer. At least according to the state of California...

You were still staring at the floor, shaking your head back and forth gently. It was the perfect moment to strike. You weren't even looking...

Wait... You weren't that good an actor... Your acting was much more... melodramatic. If this was an act, you would be prancing around, taking dramatic poses, and starting every sentence with "alas!". You really did look upset... This wasn't a show...

Rationality returned to her. She was wrong. You did care. You always had. Even when she was just a voice in the back of your mind...

If you didn't care, then why did you eat chocolate for her? Why did you make a habit out of buying chocolate bars, her favorite kind, then relinquishing control of your tongue to her while you ate it? What was in that for you? You couldn't taste anything when she was using your tongue. All you got out of that was out of shape.

Whenever she asked for a taste of whatever you were eating, you would let her finish the meal. You even took her food preferences into account when making or ordering food, on the off chance she wanted a nibble. She told you once that she hated pickles. You never ate them again. That was ten plus years ago...

Why did you watch her favorite TV shows and movies, even though they frightened and disturbed you? Why did you fight the urge to cover your eyes during the violent and gory parts you knew she loved? Why did you do that, even though you knew that what you would see would prevent you from sleeping for the next month? Why was it more important that she be entertained then you be able to sleep?

She was just a stowaway, a squatter, a parasite, and yet, you did all this for her. You accommodated her. You rolled out the red carpet for her. You let her use the guest soap and towels, even though they were really just for decoration. There was no doubt about it, you cared. Even when she was in your mind, she was always on your mind.

* * *

Why was she trying to convince herself that you didn't care for her? ...Oh, right. She was still planning on killing you along with everything else, wasn't she? But that shouldn't matter! You caring for her didn't change anything. You would die with the rest of them once she was done having fun with you. It's not like she cared for you back, did she?

She imagined herself taking her knife and stabbing you in the heart. Reading your last thoughts through the look in your eyes. It would come as a shock to you. You thought you had changed her, you thought she cared for you, but no, you were just a toy of hers. A simple prop to occupy her time. But playtime was over now. Now it was time for work. The life would fade out of your eyes and she would kiss your lips one last time as the warmth and color left them...

Ugh... she felt a little sick. Her... chest hurt... her... heart... Uh oh... this didn't mean... she didn't really... no...

Damn...

This was just a little setback, though. Nothing to be worried about. She had just forgotten herself. She had just taken things a little too far. It was just... overwhelming having a body again. She just wanted to feel alive. She had missed out on so much... She was just having some fun with you for a while. Eventually the honeymoon would end. She wasn't going to give up on her ultimate goal, her purpose, the reason she existed, for you... was she? She couldn't...

She imagined herself killing you again. Ugh. Maybe... she didn't have to do this? She could try to ignore the... urges again. She had been given a second, no, third chance. Maybe it was a sign? Maybe she could finally do it this time? With your help... maybe she had a chance... a chance at a normal life...

Or maybe... maybe she just didn't have to kill you? She could kill everything but you and the two of you could be together forever! You could be partners, traveling from world to world... You would, of course, be upset at first, but you would forgive her eventually, wouldn't you? Was there a limit to your capacity to forgive? If you could forgive... him... then surely...

You would be awfully lonely when she was off killing things, though... Maybe, she could spare your friends too? She didn't have to kill every single thing, did she? And sparing anyone kind of necessitates not destroying the world. You and your friends would have to live somewhere... She could leave just this one... for you...

No... If she was going to do it, she had to go all the way. She wanted to be so powerful that she would transcend humanity. Become more than human. You couldn't transcend humanity and still be humane.

She would have to kill you last, once she was near the apex of detachment. You wouldn't mean anything to her then. Maybe after she had killed everything else, you would be resigned to your fate? Maybe you'd go willingly? Maybe you'd think you'd see your friends again?

No. You were too determined. You wouldn't fight her, but you wouldn't go without a fight. You would act. You would reach out to the last little bit of humanity left inside her and grab onto it, like a handle, and pull with everything you had... Would she be able to resist? Killing you wasn't going to be easy, any way she sliced it.

She couldn't have her cake and kill it too. It wasn't fair. Why did she have to choose? Why did it have to be this way? Why... Why did she have to kill anything? Why did she have to feel this way? Why her?! Why couldn't she just be normal?! Why?! Why?! Why?!

Why... Why did she have to survive the fall? It could all be over now... Maybe... the best thing for her... and you... and... everybody... was to... just... kill... one... person...

* * *

What was that? You heard... sobbing? You looked up at her. "Whoa, are you ok?"

She had buried her face in her hands. Tears fell through the gaps between her fingers. It looked like... her eyes had melted and were leaking out of... Ugh... What a horrifying thought... Where the hell did that come from?

"I'm... fine." She said the exact opposite with all forms of nonverbal communication.

"Hey, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to upset you..." You had never seen her do this before. Before now, you weren't sure if she could. You were honestly a little disturbed. You just wanted it to stop. "It's ok, really!"

"No, it's not that..." She wiped a bad memory out of her eye.

"What is it, then?" You reached over to comfort her. "What's wrong?"

"I said I'm fine!", she snapped and slapped your hand away.

You jumped back a bit and quickly retracted your hand.

Her outburst had startled her more than you. "Please, just..."

"Ok, sure...", you said. "I'm... sorry."

The two of you sat in silence for a while. She was exhausted. All that thinking in such a short amount of time had fried her brain. The replacement parts had been ordered, but they wouldn't be here until tomorrow morning at the earliest.

She had finally come to a decision, though. What she truly wanted, more than anything in the world, at least at this moment, was...

She made eye contact. Without speaking, she called for help... and you came to her. You gently wrapped your arms around her. She rested her head on your shoulder and closed her eyes.

* * *

*Sniff, sniff*

"What is that?" She put her nose to your clothing and inhaled deeply. "You smell like... Dad?"

"Ugh." You audibly cringed.

"What?", she asked.

"Oh, sorry.", you said. "It's just... I get a little uncomfortable when you call him 'Dad'."

"Why?", she asked. "He was my Dad, too."

"I know... but if I call him 'Dad'..." You pointed at yourself. "And you call him 'Dad'..." You pointed at her. "That makes it sound like we're..."

"Siblings?", she asked. "Well, we are, sort of..."

"Agh!", you yelped. "Don't say that!"

"But we are!", she said. "Legally, I think."

"I know! I know!" You threw your hands in the air. "I just... don't like to think about it."

"Why are you so weirded out by this?", she asked. "It's not like we're blood related or anything."

"Yeah, but still..." You stared off into the distance. Since you were indoors, "the distance" was a wall, three feet away from you.

Chara mentally crossed "incest" off her list of fetishes to ask you about. Neither of you said anything for some time. It was long enough to microwave one potato, but not two.

"You're right, though.", you said.

"Hmm?" She turned her head back to you.

"The outfit.", you said. "It is one of Dad's old ones. From back when he was younger and smaller."

She looked you over. "It's still really big on you."

"He was still really big!" You held your hands apart, the distance between them, an approximation of the width of his torso.

"Wait a second..." She examined your clothing further. "That's not even a tunic. It just one of his shirts..."

"What, really?" You pulled the fabric away from your body and looked it over. "How can you tell?"

"Look." She pointed at your hip. "There's the breast pocket! It's all the way down there!"

"Oh jeez! I thought that was like a pants pocket or something. I guess that explains why there isn't another on the other side." You reached into the pocket and pulled some things out. "Look, I even put my keys and wallet and phone in there without even thinking!"

She laughed. "Look at how big it is! It's like the size of a backpack!"

"Yeah!", you said. "I bet I could have ridden around in it when I was a kid."

Her eyes lit up. "We did do that! I remember, we used to fight over who got to go first, me and... uh..."

"Asriel?", you asked. "That sounds like fun! I wish I had thought to do..."

She looked straight ahead. The tears had returned to her eyes.

"Oh...", you said. "Sorry..."

This time, she came to you. Another moment of silence passed as you held her.

* * *

"Look, I know I've probably said this hundreds of times over the years...", you said. "But if you ever need someone to talk to..."

"I know.", she said.

"Ok." You extended your hand, palm facing upwards. "Well, the offer still stands."

She sighed. "Not now. Maybe someday."

"Ok.", you said. "Whenever you're ready."

It was quiet again for a bit.

"I'm sorry about lying to you.", she said. "I didn't mean for you to take it so seriously and waste your time..."

You shrugged. "It's fine. I'm over it."

"How about I make it up to you?" She ran her fingers down your arm. "What do you say, we do something... slightly less kinky?" Her tone of voice had a suggestive quality to it.

"What do you have in mind?" You knew what she meant.

"You tell me." She placed her hand on your thigh, close to your... uh... breast pocket.

"Stamp collecting?!", you asked. "I thought you'd never ask!"

"Ok, something kinkier than that..." She climbed into your lap, wrapped her legs around your waist, and grabbed you by the collar. It couldn't be made any clearer.

"Kinkier than stamp collecting, but less kinky than vore?", you asked. "That is an incredibly large range! Why, just about every possible activity fits between those two extremes!" You placed your hand on your chin and pretended to think about it for a moment. "Frisbee Golf? Antiquing? You'll have to be more specific!"

She let go of your collar. "Ok, you know what?" The suggestive quality to her tone of voice was gone, replaced with irritation. "Frisbee Golf does sound like fun. Let's do that instead."

"Ok, I'm done! I'm done!" You overlapped your arms around her until there was no distance between you, then you kissed her.

* * *

*Sniff, sniff*

She inadvertently caught a whiff of your clothes again. They smelled overwhelmingly of Asgore, like someone had made a perfume of his scent, sprayed it all over a shirt made out of his hair, then he wore it for years. Without her consent, her brain imagined for a second that it was Asgore she was kissing, Asgore she was straddling, Asgore who she was about to do the monster mash with, Asgore, her adopted father...

She broke the kiss. "Ok, now I'm creeped out. Before we do anything, you have to get rid of those clothes."

"Oh." You looked down at your outfit. "Alright, one second." You pulled the monster clothes off over your head and tossed them into the corner of the room.

"No, I want them out of the house.", she said.

"What?", you asked. "Really?"

"Can you just put them in the car or something?" There was a hint of desperation to her voice. "Please?"

"Why are you so weirded out by this?", you said, using a caricature of her voice.

"Oh, shut up.", she said. "It's your fault! Your anxieties are contagious or something..."

* * *

They were. Not long from now, your greatest fear would become hers.


End file.
